Memories
by Rae1399
Summary: A BBRae oneshot. Get ready for a feels trip, kids.


"… _we wish to put up walls inside ourselves to block out these feelings, but that's the problem: he made you_ _ **feel.**_ "

She woke up into the same dark room. She smells the usual lavender on her skin. She opens the shutters on her window to let in light. Her room illuminates with bright sunlight and warm promises. She stops to look around her room, starting her daily routine.

She went into her closet to put on her normal clothing, today was an off day for the team. She looks through their closet, pushing his green shirts and uniforms to the side. She slipped on light colored jeans and a casual purple top. Hating how she looked in the mirror, she used her powers to turn the mirror toward the wall.

She walked out of their room and into the kitchen. The room smelled of the usual smell of meat. Cyborg moved out of her way as she moved toward the cup cabinet. Pulling the green mug Beast Boy got her two years ago, she made her favorite chamomile tea. She sat on the couch with Starfire for a bit before returning to her room.

She opened her door and decided it was time to do some redecorating. She began to move her heavy desk. After the desk was relocated, she addressed the small black box that was partially hidden under it. She picked it up and sat on the bed, setting the box on her lap.

She flipped open the tiny silver latch, hesitantly, remembering what she put in the box. Inside the box, she found several love letters from Beast Boy. All of them signed "Love you, Rae.", "Love, Garfield Logan.", "I love you." and so on. She chuckled at his persistence through the years.

Setting the letters aside, joining them was a pack of cigarettes that Raven confiscated off of Beast Boy when he was going through an edgy phase. When he couldn't find the pack she stole, the phase died, she believed because he was too lazy to go looking for the missing pack. A Neon Trees CD joined the pile of memories, there because he once played the album over and over throughout the entire tower for a straight week.

Raven continued rummaging through the box and found a small Ziplock bag containing all of the fortune cookie fortunes her and Beast Boy had received throughout their many Chinese takeout ordeals. She placed the small bag in the pile and continued her dig through the box. The next item she found was an Altoids tin containing a paperclip necklace from several years ago that the changeling made. She giggled to herself, thinking of his childish ways. It's amazing how a paperclip necklace had advanced to a gold chain with a diamond charm, hanging on her neck. She brought her hand to her chest, feeling for the heart-shaped charm around her neck. It hadn't went anywhere, not a surprise considering she never took it off.  
Inside the now emptying box sat a small green bunny plush that he had gotten her years ago when they first started dating. She remembered the night he gave it to her. It was the first time he had said "I love you", and Raven had teleported away. It took her a month after that to finally say those three words.

She took all of the jewelry that remained in the box out. Two pairs of earrings, one set of emerald earrings and one set of amethyst. Three necklaces, a macaroni necklace, a silver chain with a single emerald on it, and a gold chain with an empty gold locket on it. _I need to put some pictures into that_ , she thought to herself.

She pulled out a stack of small Polaroids they had taken together. In all of them but two she was frowning, except for two. In one of the happy ones, she was smiling. In the other, she had her tongue stuck out at the changeling while he held her in his arms at a group dinner. She remembered Starfire taking this picture on Beast Boy's favorite vintage camera.

Not many objects remained in the box. A few Pokémon cards, some handwritten post-it note love letters from both Raven and Beast Boy, a friendship bracelet, an old Titans communicator, a ring box that once contained her engagement ring, some old doodles and drawings, and a folded up piece of paper. She unfolded the paper, smoothed it out and read it.

 _Hey Rae,_

 _Today we went to the Jump City conservatory, and I think it might have been the best day of my life. I never knew someone could look so beautiful when looking at flowers. Speaking of flowers, my favorites were the violets. They reminded me of you. That may sound cheesy, but you understand, right? Even with so many pretty things around us, you were the most beautiful living thing in the room. I don't mean to call you a 'thing', but you get it right? I'm not a poet or anything, I'm sorry mama. I can't help but think about how I fall more and more in love with you every day, and I don't want that to change. You amaze me, Raven. You're what keeps me going. Anytime my beast tries to win over, you bring me back again. You make me Garfield Logan instead of Beast Boy. I swear I'm not a beast, and I'll try to hold up that promise when I'm with you. Thank you so much for everything, Rae. I love you._

 _Love, Garfield Logan._

She remembered the day he gave her that letter and smiled to herself. The letter was the last item in the box, so she put everything back carefully. She looked at the clock and realize she had spent three hours looking through the history of their relationship.

She exited her room. The rest of the team was sitting in the living room, they all looked up at her when she entered. "Are you ready?" Robin said to the empath. "Yeah, I'm ready." She replied.

The team gathered in the car and drove down the street. They made the turn into the park, one giant hill sitting in front of the team. They climbed said hill slowly, taking their time to get to the top. At the top rested a stone slab that read:

 _GARFIELD MARK LOGAN (BEAST BOY)_

 _A TITAN, FRIEND, BROTHER, HUSBAND, AND HERO._

 _1992-2015_

Cyborg was the first to speak. "I can't believe it's been a year, BB. You really do know how to make an exit, huh?" he said, smiling painfully.

Everyone huddled around the site, crying and shaking, holding hands as they all mourned over their friend who had died saving all of their lives.

Raven found herself crying for the millionth time in the middle of the night. She clutched onto one of his shirts, hoping to have the smell of him against her skin again. She cried, hoping that he could somehow come back to her.

She tossed and turned in their bed all night until he finally came back to her, taking her to their favorite pizza shop. She smiled with him and held onto him as long as she could.

Until she woke up the next morning.

In their bed.

Alone again.


End file.
